lol i'm pretty certain I have an actual sinus infection this time, instead of just a cold.

and i'm really close to hiatus-ing at eronum because of it. JUST BECAUSE I'D RATHER BE IN BED THAN ON THE COMPUTER. auuugh.



If you don't mind, you could figure out what makes a valentine
You could put a finger on what makes a girl weak
When you fall for things
Like the new voice on your machine
And the way he says,
"It's me."

OH MY GOD MY THROAT IS SO

GROSS AND SWOLLEN AND LASDFKSDF

can I just get sick and get it over with please. sore throats are the worst. hopefully it's a cold if I even DO get sick. cold's I can deal with, however miserable. B|

eyebrow waxing tomorrow ewww if i'm not feeling any worse. RIDING SATURDAY? also if i'm not feeling worse. auuuugh.

Is it weird that watching Storm Chasers, it seems kind of like a dream job? That stuff terrifies me, but it's sort of beautiful and definitely amazing. The science and the storms themselves.

Right now I... don't really know what my problem is. I feel sort of numb, sort of blank, and at the same time i'm scared i'm going to get even worse. I want spring. A distraction. I should call Sarah.

I'm tired of being so depressed. Sometimes I feel like I should see a psychiatrist, but that seems dumb. Sometimes I think I should just talk to my mom, but that seems even more dumb.

I'm always such a mess. And mostly i'm just whining, I know that. I don't know. I'm just hoping tomorrow will be better.

TOTALLY USELESS UPDATE, I KNOW. idk i'm just trying to make some sense of my thoughts. It's just getting through it, I guess.

( MUSIC )


BECAUSE JESS ASKED ME TOO. I need to find some more music and add some variety.

... IN FACT I'LL DO THAT NOW.

fml I really do have a journal for every character ever (in bleach). I need a liiiiiife- oh but I will be going riding sunday. hopefully. if everything goes well and mom doesn't just RUIN MY PLANS I need to get my license.

DERP DERP SO NOT MISSING POLY DERP DERP DERP lol no not really, although I am, I just know better. already kind of scared i'm failing at the game i'm still in, although it's not fast enough for me to be worried. still need to post, but i'm not confident enough in her voice. ffffff.

siiiiiigh tired.